Don’t Let Your Body Language Give Away Your Affair
The Associated Press has estimated that 22 percent of men and 14 percent of women who are married have had at least one sexual relations with someone other than their spouse. Depending on your vantage point, you are either a potential cheater or someone who thinks your partner is cheating. Either way, three key body language indicators point to adultery. If you are considering an affair or hiding one, you will want to take note of these indicators. If you are a suspicious spouse, these indicators can either confirm your suspicions or help you take your investigation to the next level.
Before we get started, consider an impaired driving checkpoint. Aside from trying to get a whiff of alcohol, the officer will take note of body language before deciding whether to pull the driver over for further investigation. The three key areas any investigator will consider are: eyes, hands, and body position.
First, the eyes. When someone is lying, chances are high that their eyes refuse to make firm contact. Liars, and cheating spouses will avert their eyes. A cheating spouse will not want to look their partner in the eye and tell an outright lie in their response to “Are you cheating on me?” or “Where were you, I called the office and you weren’t there?” or some such direct question. If you suspect your spouse of infidelity, look at the eyes. There, you will find the only answer you need. If you are cheating, practice eye contact and be aware of how your eyes move when you are asked direct questions. Either learn how to lie with sincerity while staring someone straight in the eyes or start avoid eye contact altogether.
The second indicator; the hands. Professional poker players and investigators alike look for giveaways when someone is hiding something, whether a great hand or a crime, or an affair. Whether suspects know it or not, they behave differently when under pressure or when nervous. A lot of the time, this anxiety surfaces via the hands. If a suspect fidgets with another body part or any other item (like a pen) when asked about potential infidelity, chances are they are at least nervous about the line of questioning. And in most cases, it is unlikely that someone would be nervous about something unless they are at least partially guilty. As a suspicious spouse, take note of what your spouse does with his or her hands when you start discussing your suspicions. If you are looking to start an affair, take note of how you react (in particular your hands) when you find yourself in a situation that makes you nervous (like dealing with a difficult client or delivering bad news).
Lastly, positioning. Most liars and cheating spouses in particular do not intend to hurt their victims (hence why a cheater lies to his or her spouse in the first place). As such, people who have something to hide will normally avoid direct contact with their victims. Its the basis for putting authority figures behind desks or on the phone (your banker sits behind a desk, your interviewer typically turns down your application over the phone). The reason for the desk is to put a “screen” of sort between the bad-news bearer and the subject. Cheaters do the same thing when lying. Either they shift their body so that they are not face-to-face or they use other object to put distance between themselves and their spouse. As a cheater, be aware of how you interact when your spouse. As a suspicious spouse, don’t ask your questions at times when your spouse has a screen — e.g. while doing dishes or another chore where he or she is given an easy alternative to facing you.
If you consider yourself a cheater or a potential cheater, you should take care to memorize the items discussed in this article. As a next step, visit the most-common adult dating websites and learn just how common infidelity really is… in your geographic area! You will be surprised to learn just how many folks in your city or town are as curious or interested in discretion or having an affair as you are.
If you believe there is a possibility that your spouse is cheating, the three indicators above can provide some affirmation to your suspicions. With this, it may be time to seek professional help in getting hard proof.
Tagged with: Marriage
Filed under: Marriage
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